Sunsets With A Bowl Of Oatmeal
by BellatrixLestrangey
Summary: Nerissa and Yan Lin are old ladies living in a house on Earth. Nerissa is a crazy cat lady who likes scaring children and Yan Lin has to put up with her companion's misanthropy.


Yan Lin sat on the porch spooning down a bowl of cinnamon oatmeal. Nothing was better than watching the sunrise with a bowl of cinnamon oatmeal. Nothing of course, except watching the sunrise with a bowl of cinnamon oatmeal _alone_ …without the other old bat who dwelled in her house. Yan Lin narrowed her eyes as Nerissa came to stand directly in front of the sun. With a halo of light around her, the other woman deceptively appeared as something like an angelic figure.

"Out of the way, I'm gonna miss the best part, ya old bat." Yan Lin waved Nerissa away.

"Best part?" Nerissa grumbled. "The best part looks just like every other part of the sunrise."

"No! No! It's different." Yan Lin insisted.

"You've seen one sunrise you've seen them all." Nerissa replied.

"You can't even read a newspaper without your glasses, no wonder you think they all look the same." Yan Lin shoots back.

Nerissa's eyes narrowed. Moving in with Yan Lin and her sunsets and her extensive knitting had been a mistake. Higher powers forbid, she start knitting and playing solitaire on the kitchen table too. No, there were other much more promising activities like feeding the birds so that she could later feed them to her cats and screeching at children to get off of her lawn. After all, it was _her_ yard. However, Yan Lin was making this very difficult as she would _invite_ children into their yard. This night would be different though, this time when they came knocking and asking with puppy dog eyes, "can we please catch fireflies in your yard" she would be waiting in the bushes. She cackled to herself, for once she couldn't wait for the little darlings to arrive. It would be like Halloween only better. Maybe not that good, she decided. Halloween was her favorite time of the year. She and Yan Lin didn't have the biggest house and it wasn't on a hill, in fact it looked like every other house on the block except for the broken window shutter. But the children knew it anyways, they knew it because Yan Lin would hand out caramel apples and king sized candy bars to anyone brave enough to approach. In the same way that their house wasn't noteworthy, neither was their decorations. In fact Yan Lin did most of the decorating; a cute, happy spider, a smiling jack-o-lantern, and a few sheet ghosts hung in the trees. If Nerissa had her way their home would be converted into a horror house with spiderwebs in every corner (filled with spiders, the real looking ones), fake blood spatter—or real, that didn't matter to Nerissa, and electronic skeletal hands that clamped down on the feet of the unexpecting, among other things. Cracked windows and a creaking wooden door would add to the atmosphere especially if they gave the house paneling a weathered look. She would have her house looking like such year-round if she had her way. But she did not. No matter, the bubbly decorations Yan Lin liked, granted her the element of surprise.

Oh no, it wasn't the house that had the kiddies reluctant to receive their treats. It was Nerissa herself. Every year she would jump out like a loon, waving her cane and snarling. The youngsters would drop their candy and bolt, no costume required. And she would scoop up all of the candy for herself.

Yan Lin of course had a word or two to say, "ya old coot, look whacha did." Or maybe even, "and here I brought all of these apples, yer ruining everything ya old witch." It always brought tears to Nerissa's eyes, the happy kind.

So if the woman was being honest, she was feeling giddy and couldn't wait for Yan Lin to pipe up, "oh of course dears, you can use our yard."

For the time being, Nerissa lurked at the windowsill, peering out periodically and occasionally making crude gestures at Yan Lin when she looked her way. "A good night, it's gonna be a good night." She muttered to herself, stroking Merissa's fur. The black cat purred in pleasure. Of Nerissa's thirteen cats— Minx, Mellow, Marlo, Mori, Mandy, Mark, Marcus, Metero, Marley, Melissa, Marko, and Richard Ricardo IV—Merissa was her favorite. Richard Ricardo IV was her least, that was the cat Yan Lin had picked out and was the only tabby in her family of black cats. Even so, together she and the thirteen made up the League of CATastrophe. A fine team they were. Nerissa fixed her eyes on Merissa, "are you gonna help your mistress ruin the children's first day of summer?" The can burshed up against her leg. "Oh, yes you are. You are a bad kitty, a very bad kitty, just like mistress Nerissa."

"Ya ain't a kitty ya old hag." Yan Lin commented as she put her bowl of oatmeal in the sink.

"I know that!" Nerissa barked. "But I'm bad."

"Really, really bad?" Yan Lin asked.

Nerissa would not take the bait, that hip music wasn't her style. Nothing could beat, The Doors. Instead she scuttled outside with Merissa, Minx, Marlo, and Marley in tow. "Scatter, all of you!" She commanded lifting her hands to the sky. But just like she, the cats weren't what they used to be so she had to lift each one up and put them in their designated hiding places. She stationed Merissa in the bush directly behind her, inevitably that would be where the children ran. With any luck, their abrupt movements would cause Merissa to hiss. What a good plan, Nerissa was brilliant, a genius really. She leapt into the bush. Nevermind the splinters and the twigs jabbing into her arms, they would be worth it.

"Eeeeehh, sure ya can use our yard for firefly catching." She heard Yan Lin reply. "Just watch out for the house demon, she's around here somewhere…" She trailed off, narrowing her eyes.

Nerissa rubbed her hands together in anticipation, snickering softly to herself. The children were having a blast, giggling and bouncing up and down and whooping in delight when they finally took hold of a lightning bug. Unfortunately, they were keeping near the fence and not her bush. But her time would come, oh it would come alright. All she had to do was be patient.

She observed one child as he strayed from the group. Her grin widened, he would be her victim. And, how delightful!—he was following a lightning bug that drifted right towards her. She tapped her fingers together, resisting the urge to cackle. At last, at last her moment was coming. Just as planned, the insect took perch right on one of the leaves of her bush. With the most cheerful grin, the child reached out, bracing himself to yell, "I caught one!" But he never had the chance because it was Nerissa who caught one! Right around the wrist! She fastened her hand around it and emerged from the bush at a startling speed. But instead of saying 'BAH!' or 'BOO' as she had planned she shouted, "ow, my hip!" The kid still ran off screeching in fear, so her mission was a success, but at what cost?

"Yan." She called out. "Yan, I've fallen and can't get up."

"Serves ya right ya old fart." Yan Lin folded her arms and mumbled, "scaring away the kiddies like that."

So it was that Nerissa felt the brutal pangs of betrayal. Or maybe that was just her throbbing hip, she didn't have a heart to actually feel betrayal with. She didn't have a heart to use quintessence with either. She tsked to herself. Maybe the League of CATastrophe would come to her aid. Until then she would lie on the ground as Yan Lin laughed that wheezing chuckle.

She remained in such a state until Yan Lin had the kindness to carry her back to her room. "I don't know how ya made it this far ya crusty old crone. I don't know how I lived with ya this long." But truth be told, Yan Lin wouldn't have chosen any other companion to live out the rest of her days with. At least Nerissa was entertaining.


End file.
